Graduation Erasure Poem

Erasure Poem

Graduation, a time of celebration,

a time to reflect on life’s journey,

a time of change.

Change!?

Sure, why not change!

Let’s change the venue,

let’s change the attire,

heck let’s not even have a formal graduation!

Now that is change!

Instead, let’s leave the graduation

solely to the students.

Let them have their own personal celebration

whether at their house, a park,

or any other place they prefer.

Let them take as much,

or as little time to celebrate

as they want.

It is their choice on how they want to celebrate.

So celebrate at any place you want,

Celebrate at any time you want,

and most importantly, celebrate if you want to.

Only if you want to.

Indiana Jones background

Hello -

I've just posted a song titled Indiana Jones. For the record I have not seen any of the movies in their entirety, but back to the song. It is meant to be a Dylan-esque folk song where I describe some real items and some fictional items. (For the record the chorus is purely fictional same with the events leading up to it, however the first stanza and the third-to-last stanza is real.) I will highlight these parts if I can:

Indiana Jones

I ain’t got no woman baby,

and I ain’t got the time.

Ain’t got the desire either

but that ain’t no crime.

But every night I go to sleep

I dream of all these women with me,

and it’s such a crazy thing

‘cause most of the time I can’t see.

One night I had this crazy dream

where I was transported to this oasis scene.

Everything about it was so serene

so I decided to spend some time.

When out of nowhere came this beautiful lady.

The most beautiful lady I’ve ever seen.

At first I thought my vision was kinda hazy

but she was equally serene.

Then she came up to me,

asked me to be her man.

I didn’t know how to respond.

I just f-r-o-z-e.

And I asked her:

“Who’s your Mister baby?”

She said: “Indiana Jones.”

Maybe I heard wrong or I was goin’ crazy.

“So are you gonna be my man?”

“Well honey, we’ll see if I can.”

Then I realized what I’d just done

I realized I had won.

I stole my woman from Indiana Jones. (Hey!)

I stole my woman from Indiana Jones.

I stole my woman from Indiana Jones. (Hey!)

I stole my woman from Indiana Jones.

Now, the first part may be a lie,                

but until day is nigh                                     

I won’t have no woman.

I won’t have no woman.

But I’ve still got that crazy dream.

The one with the serene scene.

The one with the greatest act.

As a matter of fact;

I stole my woman from Indiana Jones. (Hey!)

I stole my woman from Indiana Jones.

I stole my woman from Indiana Jones. (Hey!)

I stole my woman from Indiana Jones.

I stole my woman from Indiana Jones.

 The purple part is fictional while green is the truth. - Maxx Willsohn

Idiana Jones

Indiana Jones

I ain’t got no woman baby,

and I ain’t got the time.

Ain’t got the desire either

but that ain’t no crime.

But every night I go to sleep

I dream of all these women with me,

and it’s such a crazy thing

‘cause most of the time I can’t see.

One night I had this crazy dream

where I was transported to this oasis scene.

Everything about it was so serene

so I decided to spend some time.

When out of nowhere came this beautiful lady.

The most beautiful lady I’ve ever seen.

At first I thought my vision was kinda hazy

but she was equally serene.

Then she came up to me,

asked me to be her man.

I didn’t know how to respond.

I just f-r-o-z-e.

And I asked her:

“Who’s your Mister baby?”

She said: “Indiana Jones.”

Maybe I heard wrong or I was goin’ crazy.

“So are you gonna be my man?”

“Well honey, we’ll see if I can.”

Then I realized what I’d just done

I realized I had won.

I stole my woman from Indiana Jones. (Hey!)

I stole my woman from Indiana Jones.

I stole my woman from Indiana Jones. (Hey!)

I stole my woman from Indiana Jones.

Now, the first part may be a lie,                

but until day is nigh                                     

I won’t have no woman.

I won’t have no woman

But I’ve still got that crazy dream.

The one with the serene scene.

The one with the greatest act.

As a matter of fact;

I stole my woman from Indiana Jones. (Hey!)

I stole my woman from Indiana Jones.

I stole my woman from Indiana Jones. (Hey!)

I stole my woman from Indiana Jones.

I stole my woman from Indiana Jones.

Coffee Can

Well I’m just an old sailor sitting on a ship.

Said I’m just an old sailor sitting on a ship.

Nothing to do but pass my time

with an old coffee can and a bottle of wine.

I play on this ol’ coffee can all day and all night.

While the waves roll around and give lesser men a fright

Playing this ol’ coffee can keeps my mind at ease

cause after awhile it’s the only thing that seems to please

Waves keep a-rolling

around and around.

Said the waves keep a-rolling

around and around

But I’m just gonna play

with my ol’ coffee can

cause I’m also a prisoner

and there ain’t no end in sight for me man.

Teddy Quatrains

Teddy Quatrains

The only thing I wish I did on Spring Break

that I did not get to do

was play with my oldest computer Ted.

Now who is Ted?

Ted is a 20+ year-old

black IBM Thinkpad 380XD.

He is of use to no one

but me.

Why is that?

He has a few problems

Some can be considered major

and some can be considered minor.

Much to my delight

he also doesn’t go on the internet.

I don’t know if he ever has,

but at this point it is immaterial.

What I would like to do

(And this may just be one for my imagination.)

is to use good ol’ Ted while working with

a Simply Fit board.

Now, as I’ve said before

I don’t know if that would work

but I’m currently using Mr. Ted to type this

whilst breaking my own rule.

Now what’s this rule I’m currently breaking?

My own rule about not using computers on holidays.

Granted Ted was used on a previous Easter many moons ago

so he might be the exception.

Now granted I said might,

even if it’s approaching Easter Night.

Teddy boy’s still working hard, and for me

that’s a pleasant sight.

Don Rickles Tribute

The poem found underneath this post is a tribute to the great Don Rickles. The great likelihood is that we will never see a comedian like him (mostly his great comedic timing and style). So I hope you and Mr. Rickles will enjoy this.

Thank you very much.


T.L. Altmann

Thanks for the Laughter

Thanks for the Laughter

Thanks for the laughter
even though I only really knew you
as the voice of Mr. Potato Head.

Thanks for the laughter;
you and Frank will have some good laughs.
I bet you've already started them.

It's probably a great time up There,
Johnny Carson is probably having a good laugh
up There too as you're probably roasting him pretty good.

So while we're all saddened because you are gone
you gave us laughs for over sixty years
and graced the world with your presence for over ninety wonderful years.

So, thanks for all the memories Don Rickles,
have good laughs and make some jokes,
and, to paraphrase/quote your character Mr. Potato Head: "Toss Him overboard!"

Bring on the Baseball!

Bring on the Baseball!

Bring on the bats,

bring on the gloves,

bring on the baseball!

Bring on the stadium,

bring in the fans,

bring on the baseball!

Bring it on for 162 games!

Keep it going until November!

Just bring on the baseball!

Bring on the baseball,

April is almost here.

But why wait any longer for the game we hold dear?

Bring on the baseball

and continue it all year.

After all, it is America’s Pastime, and it is one we hold dear.

What Does it Mean to be a Draft Bust?

What Does it Mean to be a Draft Bust?

What does it mean to be a draft bust?

Was the player over-drafted?

Did the player underachieve?

What does it mean to be a draft bust?

Does it just apply to players picked in the first round?

Did the team put too much of its hope in the player?

What does it mean to be a draft bust?

Was the player over-hyped;

heralded as the “next big thing”?

What does it mean to be a draft bust?

Well there are many ideas,

including the ones listed above.

But, what it really means to be a draft bust;

what it really means is…

the player didn’t live up to the hype, and thus didn’t get it done.

Food

So many fruits to choose from as one walks down the aisle.

Some of these fruits actually cost more than others.

Look around. There are fruits that will cost you $1.99 a pound

but there are others that will cost you $2.99 a pound.

Why is that? Sad thing is you’re hungry too.

Imagine if you will that you could just eat one of these pieces of fruit

without getting caught.

Don’t actually do that though! You don’t necessarily want to get thrown out of the grocery store.

Especially if you want to, or do work in one.

Graphic Novel Brainstorm

This is a rather short list with only a few bullet-points, dashes, or whatever you want to call them. Just know that with this little brainstorm I can go in a few directions if I want/need to. Here is the list:

-         Materialism (latest and greatest ideology)

-         “throw away” technology – real e-waste

-         old technology – Can it still be useful despite it’s age?

-         Commentary on these three things possibly simultaneously.

Yes it is a short list but it doesn't mean that the graphic novel will be short. These would be just central ideas. Stay tuned...

 

The Stolen Silver

Many years ago I created a story titled The Stolen Gold. It was an assignment of mine when I was in third grade. It was about leprechauns getting their gold stolen by a scientist and his henchman. It was a short three-page story that was written and illustrated by the creator of this blog (obviously I will have to locate it now but I'll be doing so at my leisure.) I had toyed with the idea of making a sequel titled The Stolen Gold II but decided against it as it would be way too similar to the first one. If you've ever seen the live action version of 101 Dalmatians and it's sequel both with Glen Close you might have an idea of what I'm talking about. I'm now starting to toy with an idea that would kind of be a sequel to The Stolen Gold titled The Stolen Silver. I'll see what happens with this idea; I may just let The Stolen Gold stand alone to just be my first written story; no sequels or anything, it's just it. I'll think about it maybe after I've started and completed Draft Busts. I'll explain what that is later.

Happy Reading! :)

T.L. Altmann

Needleman's Pens

          Hello, my name is Ned Needleman. Today I am selling pens that have run out of ink.  Now at this point you may be asking yourself: “What in the world am I going to do with pens that don’t have ink in them?” Well I’ll tell you. I am a session musician with a specialty of drumming. A long time ago I misplaced my drumsticks and I am much too frugal to by new ones. How did I solve this problem? I solved it by using what you would call “useless pens” and this method has stuck. I now have a large collection, large enough to last me a lifetime. I can’t use them all so I’m selling them at a price of $4.99. Ironic isn’t it? I’m frugal, yet I charge $4.99 for recycled pens. Hey at least I give you two of them for that price; you need two drumsticks to play the drums after all. The pens come in all colors so if you own a red drum kit, have two red pens. If you have a green drum set, have two green pens. You get the idea. I myself have a purple drum kit and do you know what color of pens I use for my purple drums? That’s right: purple. I like being color-coordinated. It is my belief everything should be color-coordinated, even my drumming outfit is purple. Sorry I’m not selling any of those today, but I do have them so I’ll keep you posted. Have a good day!

Ned Needleman.

The Square

The Square

            Once there was a square, a simple white square living in a peaceful world surrounded by the same color of white as it was. This world it lived in didn’t look like much and in fact it wasn’t much at all, but for the little square it was home. Everything in this square’s world was white, the trees, the roads, everything. It was almost as if a group called Eiffel 65 had done a rendition of there most famous song and included the square and its world in it. Aside from living in an all-white world the square was happy all was peaceful and there was never anything for it or anyone else to fear in this world. However, despite the peace and tranquility that existed in this world the square had one wish; he wanted there to be more colors.

            Sure the square liked living in a world where white was the only color around but it had gotten old and also rather boring. “I wish I had more colors to interact with,” said the square. “Living in this world is fine, but I’ve lived in this world all my life and I just know that there are other colors for me to enjoy.” Yes the square did know of other colors but he didn’t know how to get the other colors into this world. “Surely there must be other worlds that are dominated by one color,” he thought. “Unfortunately I don’t have proof that these worlds exist and I also don’t have a spaceship.” The truth of these realities made the square sad and later that night as he was in bed he saw a shooting star and made a wish on it and he said: “I wish there was at least another color in this world, otherwise paint the world black. It’s truly a dark world when no other colors are around.” He said this while looking at the star and after having said this he watched the star continue to zoom on the night’s white sky.

            He woke up the next morning refreshed and still unhappy about the world’s lack of color other than white. He was hopeful that his wish would work in some way. Once he was all ready to go for the day he left his house and met up with his buddy James.

            “Hey James, did you see the shooting star last night?”

            “I sure did man,” replied James, “what did you wish for?”

            “More colors,” replied the square, “how about you?”

James didn’t respond; he was shocked to hear that the square had wished for more colors.

            “Dude!” he exclaimed, “What in the world did you do that for?”

            “Living in an all-white world has become boring for me,” replied the square.

James was flabbergasted. He truly did not know how to respond. He just stood there with his mouth agape and so wide open that flies could come right in and have a rest.

Suddenly a black dot appeared.

            “Look out!” cried James.

The dot landed on the lower part of the square and soon more black dots appeared and landed on him including a large one that was coming right for his forehead.

            “It’s like I’m being attacked here,” cried the square, “Help me out James!”

James tried to help his friend, but just as he was about to do so a big orange dot smacked into him and covered his whole body.

            “We’re under attack!” cried James, “Everybody, duck and cover!”

Everyone around did as James had ordered as more dots that were black, purple, blue, red, yellow, green, orange, brown, and gray pelted the once peaceful world.

            When it was over everyone was in a daze. They were still shaking violently over the attack that had just happened.

            “Why is the sky blue?” a woman asked.

            “And why are the sidewalks and the roads gray?” asked a man.

James and the square looked around. The world that they lived in was now full of colors and various shades colors to boot.

            “I can’t believe it,” exclaimed the square, “my wish came true!”

            “This was your wish?” James asked him, “dude I’m orange for Pete’s sake!”

            “It’s actually not a bad look on you man,” replied the square half-jokingly.

            “Well my car better not be orange, or yellow for that matter.” James was fuming over the thought.

            “You’re quite right,” interjected a man who sounded a bit like Bernard Fox, “Orange and yellow are awful on the current cars.”

            “How would you know?” asked James.

            “My dear fellow, I’ve seen pictures and those colors do not look good.”

            “Thanks for warning me,” replied James.

The square looked around. Everyone was starting to come to grips with what was now a more colorful world; they were even enjoying themselves.

            “I’ve got to say James,” remarked the square, “Everyone seems to be enjoying the world now more than they ever did.”

            “Indeed,” replied James. “I’m starting to like being orange myself; and to think you’re earlier statement flabbergasted me.”

            “This is so much better,” said the square.

            “You said it man. Being in a monochrome world is truly boring,” replied James.

            “Now let’s just hope your car isn’t orange,” said the square jokingly.

            “I'm shuddering just thinking about it,” replied James.

            “Don’t worry about it man, you’ve seen the light,” replied the square.

“Literally,” replied a chuckling James.

The two friends continued to laugh as they walked along marveling this new colorful world. Everything was truly great and still remained peaceful despite the new colors.

Seven Generations From Now...

Seven Generations From Now…

Seven generations from now, I hope no one is materialistic.

I wouldn’t want to see people always focused on obtaining “the latest and greatest thing”.

Seven generations from now, I would hope that everyone sees one another as people.

No actual labels other than gender; it would really be more person A and person B. (Of course you can have names.)

Seven generations from now, let’s not have to worry about any disease.

We would live in a more comfortable society.

Seven generations from now, let’s also not have to worry about any types of violence.

No one really wants to live in that kind of a world anyway.

So basically, seven generations from now I would want to see a world without materialism, the majority of its labels, no disease of any type, and possibly the most important, no violence of any type. I don’t think that would be too much to wish for. No better time than the present to start now, so why don’t we and make the world more pleasant.

Baseball

Baseball

The pitch of the ball and the swing of the bat that misses. Strike one.

Another pitch, another swing and a miss, strike two.

The batter is in an 0-2 hole, the pitcher is ahead in the count; one more pitch and he’ll retire the batter. The batter yells: “Time Out!” The umpire grants it. The batter steps out of the box, adjusts his gloves and helmet, gives the bat a soft tap against his shoe and is ready to go again.

He knows the stakes: the pitcher is ahead in the count, the game is tied at 2-2 in the bottom of the ninth, nobody on, two out, 0-2 count, these thoughts keep racing through his mind. “Bottom of the ninth, I’m in danger of striking out, nobody on base. If I don’t want to see a tenth inning, I’ve got to do something about it, at the very least start a rally.”

All this he thinks about as the pitcher throws two pitches, both are out of the strike zone for our lucky batter. The count is now even at 2-2, just like the score. The batter’s patience has been rewarded he just has to focus. Another pitch, ball three, full count. The pressure intensifies along with the batter’s focus. He just lives to see one more pitch.

The pitch comes, a fastball registering at 95 miles per hour. The batter is focused and ready to swing. He waits until the ball reaches the plate, he swings, and this time he connects. He watches the ball sail, sail high and far. He knows he’s done it. He’s won the game for his team! He has hit a walk-off home run!

The crack of the bat,

The roar of the mighty crowd,

All part of the game.

The greatest game in the world, America’s Pastime, Baseball.

What's Your Word?

Unconventional

I will first preface the story by stating that I am a computer nut… just not in the way that you might think. When you think that someone is calling themselves a computer nut, you may tend to assume that they would be interested in the current computer technology. In this case, the one doing the assuming is wrong. I like older computers. Now I need to clarify this statement. Realistically what I believe an old computer is compared to the next person is quite different. It is quite possible that when you hear the words “old computer” you might think of a computer that is about three years old. Try twenty. That's right, I have a computer that's around twenty years old. (Depending on what you wanted to go by, be it Windows 95 or when he was built - 1997, you may actually get an age older than that.) The fun thing is that I'm not the only one who uses Ted (that's his name, and yes I do name all my computers. I don't mind if people reading this think it might be a tad weird.) Anyway back to the story. I am not the only person who uses Ted. Here in our little city of Pawzopolis I am the both the founder and the Mayor and Ted is a publicly used computer despite the fact that he doesn't go on the internet and would have a $210,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000 price tag on him if he were lost or damaged. Just last week I loaned him to this nice couple named Percival Perkins and his wife Priscilla, two of the town's finest citizens. They are a couple who have been together for ten years but have decided not to have children, which is fine. Here in Pawzopolis we only have one official rule: Any person gets to make up his or her mind about how they want to spend their life without being judged. I don't feel I need to go into detail yet on what would happen if this law was violated, we'll save that for another time. For now, thank you for stopping by in Pawzopolis.